Welcome to 2006

Happy New Year! I am sitting in my office, waiting to go to court for the weekend magistrate hearings. My goal is to be on my way home by a little after 2 pm if possible. Anyway, after a week of feeling really ill, I managed to sleep through most of New Year's Eve and now I feel much better. I suppose that given today is the start of the new year I should reflect on 2005 and set goals for 2006. Admittedly, 2005 was not a very big success in terms of actual weight loss, in the begining of the year I bounced up to around 170 lbs and managed to fight my way back down to around 156 lbs. I have managed to maintain somewhere between 154 and 156 ever since. This only proves that I can maintain my weightloss but I am not so good on losing more weight. So, that is my goal for 2006, I would like to lose at least another 20 lbs and preferably 40 lbs by January 2007. I have a plan on how I am going to do this, in case you were wondering. It will officially start on January 3, 2006 which is the start of this coming work week. One of the things I proved that I could accomplish over the course of 2005 was going to the gym consistently and working out consistently. I have made huge overall fitness strides but I have been stagnating recently. So, I am going to change my routine a little bit. The biggest problem I have is an inability to eat really perfectly on plan, but I am going to try to be better about it. My plan is as follows: 1. Use the resources around me more efficiently. I have a coworker who teaches classes at my gym every weekend but I never go to those classes because classes freak me out. This is silly. So, starting tuesday I am going to go to her classes. She teaches Tue, Wed, and Thur at 5:45 pm and the gym is 5 minutes from work. I have no excuse for not going on those nights. 2. Maintain my current fitness regiment. I am going to keep going to the gym five days a week for between 90 minutes and 2 hours at 5 am in the morning. It just works for me. I am going to keep lifting some weights at home and doing ab work at home five nights a week. This is what makes it possible for me to keep my weight under 160 lbs. 3. Educate myself and find new inspiration. I am going to buy more fitness books (hopefully today) and keep reading everything I can get my hands on, this helps keep me on track. I am also going to buckle down and start keeping a food and fitness diary again (a paper one). I am going to blog five days a week even if only for five minutes in the morning. 4. Clean out the fridge/ apartment and keep only good food. Today, the apartments will be emptied of pasta and other carbs except for my cereal. All the sugar and butter is being thrown out and there will be no extraneous baking for one month. Baking is my excuse to snack and I am getting rid of excuses. Tomorrow, I am restocking with vegetables, meat, eggs, and soy milk and that is it. I am making a salad for tuesday lunch and I am creating a week of menus at a time. I am going to work on cooking meals on the weekend which are healthy and can be eaten over the work week easily. 5. Take my actual measurements/ weight and post them. Update monthly. I have never really done this and it is time to start. This is information which I will post on Tuesday and then post at the begining of every month. I am debating posting progress pictures but I have not made a decision on that since I have a relatively high profile job and to some extent need to protect my anonmity on this website. 6. Organize my life and limit stress. As long as I am neat, tidy, and organized all of this is easy. When I let stress and disorganization take over it all falls apart. I am going to clean my entire apartment this weekend, get rid of my junk and get organized. I have a lot of junk in closets and a whole room which has turned into nothing but a holding area for non-used items. I am tossing everything I do not use on a weekly basis and all clothing I do not wear anymore. I may even throw out some old shoes (gasp). I may well move in the next year and I might as well get rid of the junk now rather than later. That is my plan for the next month. I am going to re-evaluate every month and see where I am and what I need to alter in my life. Most importantly, this year I am giving myself permission to not be perfect and to only worry about what I can really control in my life. I work in an incredibly stressful environment (especially right now) and I need to recognize that fact. I make decisions everyday which effect other peoples lives, and I am not just saying that to be dramatic. I send people to prison, sometimes for a lot of years, and that is a hard thing. So, this year I am going to acknowledge that stress and not kick myself for the fact that it sometimes overwhelms me and my eating habits. I am going to do the best I can everyday and trust that will be enough. Most of all, this year I am going to acknowledge and give thanks for one simple fact. In the begining of January 2004, I weighed around 242 lbs and wore a size 24. In the begining of January 2006, I weigh around 154 lbs and wear a size 10. The difference is 7 dress sizes and 88 lbs. I did it myself, no personal trainers, no nutrionist, no weight loss support group, no weight loss surgery, nothing but my own drive. Not that a personal trainer, nutrionist, weight loss support group, or weight loss surgery would have been a bad thing mind you, but they weren't involved in this process. Just me, myself, and I. Proof postitive of what I can accomplish when I put my mind to it. Now it is time to see what I can accomplish in 2006, I am looking forward to it already.

Home again

I'm back from vacation. I actually got back a week ago, but have been swamped with work. I am also sick and preparing for a felony trial. Hopefully, I will be able to talk by the time I go to trial tomorrow. I have been working out despite being sick, but I basically fell into a pile of Christmas food last week. This week is about getting back on track especially in terms of eating. Hopefully I will start feeling better which would help in terms of exercising and food. Anyway, have to get back to work now.

The table of Doom

An interesting sociological study begins today. It can be nicknamed "the christmas goody table of doom". Basically, we now have an entire table in my office which is covered with cookies and candy canes which is going to remain up for the duration of December. I think everyone can see how this is bad. Also, the table is directly in my line of sight which is bad. Of course, I cooked a bunch of the cookies on it, so possibly I am contributing to my own doom. I think in someways, this is just proof of the problem with the holiday season and that is the abundance of food around, I mean there is always food around my office but it quadruples at this time of year. So far, I have not gained any holiday weight and in fact, I lost around a pound. So, that is my new goal for the next three weeks, not to gain anything. I am working out a lot, I am up to 90 situps a day and running at 6.9 mph, and I am trying to watch what I put in my mouth. So, three weeks, and then life will return to normal, I can manage three weeks.

Still Going

Today was not a very good workout day. I know why, I did not eat very much dinner last night due to eating too much food at work. This created the end result this morning of having no energy reserves when I was working out and mad me feel slightly sick. However, I noticed a difference and I was thinking about it a lot this morning. The difference was that I kept going at the same level of difficulty, now that may have not been an intelligent move, but there was a time where I would have slowed down or stopped entirely. That time is apparently long gone because now I just work on strategies to keep myself going through the last workday workout. I knew I had a snack in my bag and there was food at work so it was just a question of making it through my workout. It was also a reminder that I need to be careful about my meals and make sure that I am fueling my body properly so I do not have this problem again. However, I kept going and that is a success in of itself.

Still not easy

Okay, the holiday season is going to be difficult. I say this because the last two days have involved bad food at work and good food at home. So, this is not going to be easy given parties and so on and so forth. I briefly saw 152.5 on the scale last night, I think it was a not to be repeated fluke given my food today. On the plus side, exercise has been really excellent and I do feel like I am pushing myself there. Just not giving myself a lot to work with by eating too many bad food choices. So, must work on that, despite the fact we are having chocolate fondue at work next wednesday and I love chocolate and fruit. My goal basically is not to gain any weight over the next few weeks, everything else is a bonus. So, still plugging along as best I can for right now, and hoping that I can make each day better than the previous one. After two years, it still is not easy and that is the honest truth.

Movement

As you may have noticed, a while back I entered yet another plateau in terms of weightloss. In other words, I hit 154 and then danced around that number for a really long time. However, this morning I finally saw real movement on the scale in the correct direction. I now weight 153 lbs, hopefully it will last. I suppose it helps that I am killing myself at the gym, I have increased my running speed, the amount of weight I am lifting, and added in more ab work and core fitness. Last night, which is normally a night off, I did 45 situps, core fitness, and some other ab work. I also briefly lifted some weights. This morning was cardio and weights. This evening will involve squats, lunges, and weights (possibly with some core fitness thrown in). I am pretty much on track with my diet, a couple minor slipups yesterday but nothing which threw off my calories for the day. I am replacing my coffee with hot tea for three reasons, first there are no calories in tea, second drinking tea is supposed to be good for you, and third having a hot beverage in the morning is the only thing which prevents me from freezing to death in my office. I will actually save calories this way because I put creamer and sugar in my coffee and that makes a 50-100 calorie beverage which I do not need to be drinking. Oh, and you want to know the really annoying thing about this, my brother who told me to do all of this was absolutely right. Sigh. As a younger sibling one attempts to never admit that your older sibling is correct about anything, it is an unwritten rule. Oh well, if I start losing weight again, I guess I can live with admitting that my brother was right about something.

Day 2 and counting

So far so good. I am on Day 2 of the no coffee plan and it seems to be working out. Well, other than the fact I am absolutely freezing right now and that is despite wearing three layers of clothing on top. I do have tea in my cupboard at home so maybe I will start bringing that into work, I have not decided whether or not I am drinking tea. I am also on track with everything else as well, yogurt in the morning, a thing of applesauce when I finished working out, and last night I had an omelet instead of pasta or rice. I am hopeful that all of these minor tweaks to my diet will help jumpstart my stalled progress. I am also working very hard at not snacking at work during the day, I am pretty sure that is where I am picking up a lot of unwanted calories in my diet. In terms of exercise, I am doing pretty well and today I actually managed to run at 6.8 mph for 30 minutes. That is a pace of around 8 minutes and 40 seconds per mile which is nice. I am going to do abs and core fitness exercises tonight and maybe lift some weights. I could not lift weights this morning because I had to go pick up my cat from the people who looked after her while I was gone. So, I only had 90 minutes at the gym, not two hours. My cat by the way, is very annoyed to be home and not at the fun house where she gets lots of treats, however I am sure she will adjust to being home.

Back from Vacation

I am back at work today after a trip of about 16 hours to get back to my little tropical island from the U.S. Mainland. The mini vacation was good for me in a lot of ways, mostly getting back on track and making life decisions sort of ways. First, I have decided that I am only going to stay out here for another 6-8 months so I am now begining the job hunt in earnest. Second, I am going to use that 6 month time frame to really work on these last 30-40 lbs I cannot seem to lose right now. So, today there was no coffee because I am cutting it out of my diet for right now, and because I have been dousing my spinal cord in massive amounts of caffine everyday and that cannot be a good plan. Second, I am getting serious about my weight lifting, I actually kicked up the weights a lot this morning and was sweating like a little maniac which had to be a good thing. Third, I am cutting pasta, cereal, and rice out of my diet for right now, I end up eating a fair amount of bread at work and I do not need to add to it with meals I eat at home. I am replacing the cereal with yogurt, fruit, and egg whites in the morning and the rice and pasta with more vegetables in the evening. I have a whole bag of unopened green peas in my freezer which I really should be eating not to mention a whole container of lentils and black beans. I do not really have very much food in my house right now, I am probably going to have to go to the store at some point in the next two days so that I do not starve to death. Maybe all of these things combined will make a really difference, maybe they will not but it is at least worth a shot. So far, I do not miss the coffee which is a good start. Oh and I did not gain weight over Thanksgiving and that is always a victory.

A brief check in

I am oddly jet lagged right now, in that today is the day before Thanksgiving but I keep thinking it is Thanksgiving because it would be where I actually live and work. Anyway, I am supposed to go workout later with my brother and then bake pies and make cranberry sauce for tomorrow. We are actually having two parties for thanksgiving tomorrow but only eating at one. Yesterday and the day before, I did actually manage to get in around a forty minute run. The weather here is much colder than I am used to back on my island and it makes working out much more difficult for some reason. I find it harder to breath and also I lack appropriate gym clothing. Running outside requires warm clothing and I just do not own any warm workout clothing. Sigh. I am off to get my hair cut and then maybe to the mall and the gym.

On Vacation

I am finally on vacation, very exciting. Last week was incredibly hectic since I was trying to resolve everything to prepare for my time off (hence the lack of posting). Yesterday, I spent 20 hours on planes and in airports before I arrived home. Due to time changes I arrived on the same day I left my little island. It is funny, I know exactly when I enter my home state just by the way the food options change, suddenly there are more extensive salad selections, fancier coffee, and skinnier people as a result. It is really fascinating to me as a concept. Not to mention the fact there is tons more fresh food in the grocery stores. This week, I will probably be a little more mellow about working out, I am going to try and go running every morning but I am not going to worry too much beyond that especially since I will be back to the gym next week Monday. This week is all about family and relaxing and that is good enough.

Tired and off track

Let us not discuss food yesterday or today, it was bad. However, exercise was good and water consumption was very good which has been a problem over the last few weeks. I also have gotten a fair amount of actual work done today which is impressive given the fact tomorrow is a holiday and I do not want to be in the office. I am still working out and keeping the difficulty high but that is about all that can be said for my efforts this week. I will workout tomorrow and then try to pull myself together over the weekend and be back on track by next week or sooner. At least I am still trying, but I just feel tired this week.

Blah

I am singularly uninspired today, about both food and working out. I worked out, but my eating has not been good today. Hopefully tomorrow will be better and it has the plus of being the last day of the work week. On the plus side, I have only had a little bit of coffee today but that does not really balance out my eating. I figure I will have a very light dinner and maybe make up for the excessive consumption during the day. I know some days are not going to be great and I just have to move on and get back on track the next day and that is my plan for tomorrow. Hopefully I will be back on track then and more inspired.

The Goodness of Glop

So, I just figured out that I will be coming into work on Friday (which is a holiday). I am not really annoyed because I was going to get up early on Friday and workout anyway. Still, it is an even better reason to get up early and go to the gym. I am once again back at the place in working out where I almost feel ill while I am working out. It will not last more than a day or two but is very common when I increase my running speed. I only went up to running at 6.6 mph and increasing my eliptical resistence by 1 but it always takes my body off guard. I will probably stick with this difficulty level for the rest of the week and then see where I am at the begining of next week. Still, according to the treadmill, I am running a 9:05 minute mile which is faster than I can really wrap my brain around at the moment. I am also cooking better food for myself at home this week, last night was beans, tomatoes, and meat stew. I will probably add peas to it tonight which will increase the vegetable content. Basically I have created what my family refers to as "glop" which is a stew that you keep adding ingredients to whenever you eat it. Good healthy stuff and that makes me happy. Not that my weight is changing mind you, but I am eating well which is half the battle.

Clean Sweep

Today was an odd workout day. Odd in the sense that it did not feel difficult in anyway. I was as sweaty at the end as normal, but just easy, almost not worth the effort. This is probably a good sign that it is time to increase the level of difficulty on all of my exercises again. I did run for 15 minutes at 6.6 mph but I did not increase the difficulty on anything else. So, tomorrow I have to increase all of my difficulty levels and that means that tomorrow will probably suck. Oh, and in case anyone is wondering, I did find my cell phone in my car, it is amazing what you find when you organize yourself properly. I have cleaned 3.5 rooms in my apartment and I have 1.5 rooms and a very messy closet left to clean. Basically, I managed to clean my kitchen, bathroom, living room and most of my bedroom. The kitchen looks especially good and now has canisters of beans decorating the countertop and hopefully convincing me to cook with them. I am trying to make sure that I get a better balance of food in my diet since I am once again hovering around 154 and not moving. Tonight I am going to have a stew of meat and black beans for dinner, I am hoping a clean kitchen will inspire me to cook more interesting things, we will see what happens over the next few days.

6 Day Work Weeks

I am begining to think that I will never have a Saturday where I do not have to go to work to catch up on what I can not do during the week. Sigh. Anyway, I just spent the last two hour cleaning up my work area and organizing my documents and files on the new shelving unit that I bought at K-Mart. I am very much a Type-A person at heart so clutter really makes me stressed and unhappy. I am going to spend the remainder of the weekend cleaning up my apartment as well, especially since I seem to have misplaced my cell phone either in my car or at home (at least I hope it is one of those two places). I did not work out today, although I had a decent workout yesterday morning. I might do some sit ups later, I am feeling lazy today for some reason. Also, I have had far too much coffee today so I am pretty wired right now which tends to make me try to do nine things simultaneously, never the best plan. Okay, I am off to do some more work and then head home to clean up the apartment.

Back to work

So, I am back after yesterday's holiday. I did actually workout yesterday, I got up at five a.m. and went to the gym for 2 hours and then went home and took a nap. Eventually I made it to the grocery store for a few essentials and then to Ross to get a couple more work shirts. I am always impressed at my ability to now buy really cheap clothing and look decent, yesterday I did not spend more than 20 dollars on anything and most of the shirts were under 10 dollars. Partially it is the weight loss and partially it is simply reality that regular sized clothing costs less than plus sized clothing (having comparison shopped at one point). So, I have enough clothing to now last until I go home in a couple of weeks, since I am once again having to edit my closet. I am not losing any weight but I am pretty much only wearing size 10 clothing with a couple of exceptions. Today has been a long annoying day, but on the plus side I worked out and it is the last night I have to work out at home with weights this week. I have to get back to work now and head off to court.

Feeling better

I feel better today, not great but better than yesterday. Well, if you discount the pounding headache I awoke to this morning which required instant consumption of pain medication. Still, better than yesterday where I never even ate lunch because I felt horrible and just tried to avoid the temptation to curl up under my desk and sleep. Needless to say, while I have worked out this week, I have not made any really gains on increasing my speed or difficulty levels. I am just going for status quo this week on my exercising, still running at 6.5 mph and doing a mix of level 7 and 13 resistence on the eliptical machine. This week going to the gym has been the goal since I am coughing and constantly battling sinus congestion and headaches. I also know I am begining to feel better because I have accomplished more in two hours this morning than I have in a week and a half. I think that is because I have been coming down with this cold and flu thing for awhile and just been trying to ignore it. Also, I am feeling motivated because tomorrow is a holiday and that means a whole day to relax and be lazy. So, if I can just get through today and my early workout tomorrow morning (which I am still planning on doing) then I can rest for the rest of the day which will be great.

Sick Girl Running

The last two days I have been slammed by a really bad cold. The kind of cold where I actually take cold medication and go to bed for 4 hour naps as a result. This is unusual because I do not take medication on a normal basis, maybe the occasional tylenol or aleve for pain. However, even with this cold I have been working out. I have read a lot of literature which says it is okay to work out when you are not feeling well and that it will not impede your recovery time. So, yesterday I lifted weights and today I did my normal routine at the gym. The only difference today was that I had to do all my breathing through my mouth because of my stuffed-up head, and I felt really warm while I was running. I think it is probably the combination of being slightly too warm because I am sick and the natural heat generated by running. I actually feel better now that I have worked out, although I am very tired today because I was not able to sleep well last night. On the plus side, I know if I can get through today and tomorrow I will be okay because wednesday is a holiday and I can sleep (although I will still go to the gym at my regular time). So, I am off to start the day and hopefully not inflict my cold on any of my co-workers.

Working on the weekend

Today is my work weekend, basically I have to go to work and charge everyone who comitted crimes last night. I like working on weekends, it tends to be very mellow and is usually only a few hours of work. I came into the office at about 9:30 am and should be headed home by about 3 pm at the latest. I usually stop at the grocery store on the way home and pick up sushi or something similar for a late lunch. Since today is my day off from anything workout related, I am usually a little more relaxed about food as well (which may seem odd). I treat Saturday as a rest day in all senses of the word, which helps me mentally prepare for the coming week. Wednesday of this week is a holiday and I may take this coming Friday off as comp time for working on the weekend. Anyway, as you can tell, I am just sort of rambling about things today because it is the weekend and my brain has shut down until Monday. I have to go finish off one more report and then go to court.

Running Dreams

Last night I had a dream about running. It was a long fast run which was really, really fun. So, it is perhaps an indication of the universe's sense of humor that my actual run this morning was really horrible and filled with side cramps and other problems. In fact my whole workout was bad, so I only did cardio and skipped weightlifting. I am hopeful that this was just a particularly bad day and Monday will be better. I am off to court, but I will try and make a longer entry later.