Wednesday, August 31, 2005

Blogging call on account of Tropical Storm

I was gone yesterday because my office was closed. A typhoon was passing through the area and we were placed on "Condition of Readiness 1" which basically means that all government offices and schools are closed due to storm conditions. We just got a lot of rain and wind gusts up to 50 mph, not really a big deal out here where everything is built to withstand much heavier storm conditions. So, to say the least, people out here understand what is going on in New Orleans and our hearts go out to them. There was a supertyphoon a few years back that caused major damage and power outages for as long as a month. Really there is nothing I can say in the face of the devastation in New Orleans that doesn't sound trite, so I am not going to attempt it here. So, I spent yesterday indoors at home, listening to the radio, cleaning up, prepping for trial, and lifting weights. I did work out in the early morning before I realized that my office was closed. The gym was packed with people working out, all the crazy people who tropical storm or not were going to get a workout in before going home to put up typhoon shutters. Priorities are important things in this world. This morning I did my usual workout at the gym, much running at 5.8 mph and the eliptical machine. I am back down to 157 as of this morning, I have no idea if that is accurate or not.

Monday, August 29, 2005

Sleep deprived ramblings

Last night I woke up at 1 am freezing and could not get back to sleep. Eventually I figured out that I was sweating from being hot and that was combining with the slightly cool air from my air conditioner to make me really cold. I turned up the air and went back to sleep. Sleep deprivation is not a pretty thing in the morning, but it is really much worse when you get to the afternoon and need a nap. I'm exhausted and rather cranky today as a result. I did manage to run entirely at 5.8 mph this morning which was a plus. I am also back down to 158 as of this morning despite some more snacking yesterday, I really need to work on that, but it may not be today especially since I forgot an afternoon snack. I am concerned that I am apparently going to trial on Friday and I once again have no suits to wear because mine are too big. Suits are expensive and I simply can't afford to buy any right now, not to mention it is not cost effective because I will just end up replacing them as I lose weight, or at least that is my theory. I am going to swing by Ross tonight and see if I can find anything for really cheap to tide me over for a few weeks. Anyway, have to get back to work now.

Sunday, August 28, 2005

A work in progress

I feel myself slipping a little bit recently on my eating plan. I think it is largely due to stress in recent weeks and a general lack of focus. I have always been a stress eater, I know this, I consider it to be a major step forward that I can actually identify when I am eating due to stress. I also eat when I am bored which explains this weekend. Mostly, it has been an extra popsicle or some chips, nothing major. Anyway, I am working on just drinking my water and eating my packed snacks, an energy bar in the morning, an apple in the afternoon. I bounced up to 159 this morning, I am not worrying about it, especially since I am hitting the time on the month when I always retain extra water weight. I am focusing more on what I am doing right, and watching what I put into my mouth. I ran this morning for 30 minutes, 15 minutes at 5.7 mph and fifteen minutes at 5.8 mph. Every week for about the past month I have raised the speed I am running at by .1 mph, it does not sound like much, but I have gone from running at 5.2 mph in July to running at 5.8 mph now. I am aiming for 6.0 mph which will mean that I am running a 10 minute mile again for the first time in a long time. This from a girl who has never really been a runner before. I have cranked up the resistence on my eliptical machine, I am begining to develop leg and arm muscles, all of these are huge gains. More than anything, I am taking better care of myself than I have in a long time. I slacked off on taking my multivitamin and my calcium pills every day but I am now taking them again. This probably sounds odd, but I have finally thrown away all my out of date makeup and I went and bought myself new facial cleansers. This is also a step forward since I need to take better care of my skin, especially given the amount that I sweat everyday (in and out of the gym, I do live in a really tropical environment). All of these are baby steps in the right direction and I am going to focus on that for awhile, rather than just worrying about occasional slip-ups.

Thursday, August 25, 2005

The Pasta Problem

I did run this morning, so that means for the past two weeks I have managed to run five days each week. This was accomplished by simply stepping on the treadmill each morning and warming up for five minutes and then running. Apparently that is all it takes to make me run in the morning. Last night, after an incredibly long afternoon at work with meetings that went from 1:30 pm until 5:00 pm straight, I went to the store to buy soy milk. People, I share a lesson with you from the front of the diet wars, don't go to the store when you are really tired and hungry. One of two things will happen, you will buy food items you do not need or you will take a really long time to make up your mind. In my case, I was craving pasta (a long time comfort food) so I spent THIRTY. MINUTES. in the pasta aisle comparing the different types of whole wheat and regular semolina pasta. Then I bought the first package of whole wheat pasta that I had picked up when I walked into the aisle. Oh, and I bought two apples. Then I went home, lifted weights, and had pasta with chicken, garlic, and warmed up salad dressing (which is a pepper based salad dressing and tastes better warm, just trust me on that, okay). I am hovering at 157.5 today, I still think 158 is more accurate for the week but I am not complaining either way. I am just glad that the week is over and tomorrow is saturday. Although, tomorrow I may go to a work related outreach program.

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Update

So, you may note that I have updated my profile slightly, and changed the links. I hate updating this site, I am not good with technology in anyway. I mean, I am a lawyer and I am sure there is a language somewhere in which that translates to "very bad with anything electronic". However, it seemed like time to post more accurate stats, and make my links be blogs which not only exist but which I read on a daily basis. So, there you go, updated bloggity goodness. I have no doubt you will notice that this means that I am finally admitting that I want to lose more than half of my original body weight. I am forced to admit that may end up being excessive eventually but to be honest, given my small frame and lack of height ( I am only 5' 2" tall), I have always figured that 110-115 lbs is what I should probably weigh. We will see what I think when I get closer to that weight. If it seems like I will end up being unhealthly skinny I will happily switch to maintainance before I hit that weight. So, that is where I am currently in my thinking. Oh, and don't expect me to change any other format things for awhile, it always makes my head hurt.

The problem with Thursdays

I have always rather disliked thursdays, they are the most tiring day of the week. It is not friday which is the end of the week and any energy which I had on monday or tuesday has evaporated on wednesday. I just drag through thursday, especially workouts, generally reminding myself that I only have to get up early one more day and then it is the weekend. Of course, I am terribly old now because sleeping in means that I sleep until 6 or 7 am rather than 4:30 am. Last weekend I knew that I was really exhausted because I slept until 8 am. My weight has been bouncing up and down a bit, yesterday it was 157, today 158. I think 158 is more accurate. I don't really care, it is below 160 again and that makes me happy. Also, I am wearing my size 10 petite pants and they are no longer cutting off my circulation. Okay, so it is going to take a couple more pounds before they really fit perfectly but I can live with that fact. Also, if I run tomorrow I will have managed to run for five days in a row for each of the past two weeks. I am running at 5.7 mph and next week I am going to start running at 5.8 mph. I can see that my fitness level is increasing the more that I run, I do have one concern which is the fact that my knee and ankle was twinging slightly last night. I have horribly bad ankles so I always worry about them. I felt okay this morning though and I will see how I feel tomorrow and take it easy if necessary.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

And now for something controversial

I figure this post is the one which will get me nasty comments/flamed in a hurry. No doubt, this is why I avoid this particular topic like the plague. That topic would be weight loss surgery (WLS), which has definately become a hot button topic over the last couple of years. I have been asked if I had WLS, more annoyingly my friends have been asked behind my back if I have had it, usually with the implicit assumption that there is no way I could have lost the weight without surgery. I worry that is becoming almost a commonplace belief, that the only way to successful lose weight is to have WLS. I realize more and more that I personally have immense amounts invested in the fact that I did this (at least to this point) almost entirely on my own, no nutrionist, no personal trainer, prepackaged meals only very briefly at the begining. The closest thing I had to outside assistance was an initial weight program set up by my brother (which I am seriously considering going back to by the way). I have probably made loads of mistakes due to my insistance on doing this my way and only my way. How you ask does this relate to WLS? Well, frankly I worry about it on some level that I can't really explain. I worry about losing that much weight so quickly and what it could potentially do to your body, I can't imagine living (even just initially on so few calories). Mostly though, I worry that by losing weight so quickly you don't really learn how to live the rest of your life in a sensible manner in terms of food, that we address the physical issues and not the real struggle which is largely mental (at least it has been for me). I personally have need a long time to learn how to manage that aspect of losing weight and I still work on it as an issue. In all honesty, I was probably a candidate for WLS at my highest weight, or at least closing in on being a candidate. I had shortness of breath, trouble sleeping sometimes, and I was eating major amounts of unhealthy food in single sittings. I seriously considered lap band surgery for about a year. Obviously, I never did any of those things, probably due to sheer stubborness on my part. Also, I have had plastic surgery once and so far once is enough. I am glad I never had surgery, but I try really hard to not judge people who have had surgery. Maybe I am wrong to worry about all of this in the first place, certainly it is not really my personal issue anymore, but I think about it sometimes in the morning when I am on the way to the gym. I wonder if I sound like one of those weight-loss fanatics who thinks there is only one right way, I would hate to think I sound like that and I don't believe that, but I still worry about the prevalence of WLS. Then again, I worry about lots of things on a daily basis, it is part of my personality. So, tell me I am wrong, right, or just plain crazy, but I think we will all have to live with the fact that I probably will still worry.

Monday, August 22, 2005

Walking through the Past

I have no idea where I came up with the above title, but then I am running out of titles. I was looking at my archives from August 2004 and looking at the differences. I weighed about 166 pounds, I was running for about 50 minutes a day at around 5.0 mph and walking for 60 minutes. I was eating about the same amount of food. Now, I am about 158 pounds, down around 8 pounds from a year ago, I am only running for 30 minutes but I am running at 5.7 mph which is faster. I was a size 12 a year ago, right now I am hovering between a size 12 and a size 10, closer to a petite size 12 really. I was whining about having fat rolls, I am still whining about fat rolls only not as loudly. Overall, I am probably slightly more fit than I was a year ago, I have noticed that when I went back to the gym in the early part of this year I was able to do much harder cardio much more quickly than in the past when I have taken breaks from the gym. I had been working out in the interim but not really very hard. Mostly though, I notice that many of the themes of a year ago are the same today. For example, I still have an ever present desire to tell sales associates that I am really buying clothing for myself and it fits, no really it does, although I do not think they would actually doubt me on that score. In fact, on the theory that confession is good for the soul, I should note that going into high end stores that only sell a few items of clothing completely freaks me out. There is a BCBG store near where I live and I scuttle in there now and again and then scuttle out again just as quickly convinced that nothing will fit. You have a mental image of me as a small squat crab now right? Okay, maybe that is just me. I am more used to me at this weight now than I was a year ago, more used to my face, and still puzzled at the speed at which I have forgotten what it was like to be really heavy. Little things seem normal now that did not before, regular sized towels can be wrapped completely around my body, the bath water in the tub totally covers me, I shop in regular stores, and no one ever stares at the amount of food I am eating at any given meal. Little things but sometimes you have to take a walk through the past to see them.

When habit falls short

I am definately a creature of habit, every morning after I work out I go to the local gas station and get a huge cup of coffee. Then I drive the two minutes to work, go to my desk, drink a huge bottle of water along with my coffee and have half a Kashi breakfast bar. By nine a.m. I have usually walked over to court which is about 4 blocks away and I don't usually get back to my desk until lunch time. Lunch is always salad which I make the night before along with another bottle of water and at some point in the day I manage to drink two additional bottles of water. I think you can now see the problem with this schedule, I don't have an afternoon snack in there anywhere. I thinking I am consistently ending up low on calories as a result, which is not my intent. Today, I was going to bring an apple to work and have it along with some of the office supply of peanut butter (my office always has peanut butter and jelly floating around, don't ask me why) but I forgot to grab it before I left for the gym. I can usually rely on another co-worker to make popcorn but a lot of days recently I have ended up going home starving and then oddly becoming less hungry on the commute home and eating a small dinner. The simple solution is to stick an extra piece of fruit in my lunch bag, or buy something that I can keep at work such as popcorn. I just need to work on getting in the habit of doing that, after all once I get into a certain pattern it should be easy to manage in the long run.

Sunday, August 21, 2005

Random musings on breasts and other things my mother wishes I wouldn't talk about on the internet

One of these days I am going to have enough time in the morning to write a really insightful post, it will not be today. This morning I managed three quarters of my run at 5.7 mph and the rest of it at 5.6 mph. Then I spent 35 minutes on the eliptical machine. This morning I weighed in at 158 and yesterday I was 159 and trust me I ate plenty of food on Saturday and Sunday so I guess I am officially into the 150's. Oh, and I discovered a really interesting thing this weekend while I was at K-mart. I have been wearing totally the wrong bra size. I have been wearing a 38C, (my parents will be so thrilled this information is on the world wide web) when actually I am a 38B. I will just say that the right sized bra makes an enormous difference when it comes to wearing clothing. I was invested in being a C cup because I had a breast reduction when I was really heavy and that was the size I ended up as after surgery, apparently losing 84 pounds will actually change that measurement. Oh, and I also had to buy smaller underwear, there is a definate benefit when you wear trousers everyday to not wearing underwear which hangs off your rear. I forgot how quickly losing weight becomes expensive because you are having to replace clothing items all the time.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Work again

I'm at work again today, and yes it is Saturday. I simply cannot get organized durring the week so I came in today to clean off my desk, figure out which cases need motions answered, and go through my mailbox. I worked until 7:00 last night and only spent two hours actually in my office so that gives you an idea about how hectic it is right now. On the plus side, I weighed in at 158.5 this morning, then again yesterday I barely stopped for lunch and I had a smoothie for dinner. I did run yesterday morning and it was a breeze and felt really good. Today is my day off and I swear that tomorrow morning I am going to go to Kmart and buy heavier weights because the ten pound weights are not causing any muscle fatigue at all when I lift. My plan for the rest of the day is to go to the grocery store on the way home and do all my shopping for the week and then I will probably stop at subway and get a sandwich for lunch. Then I am going to go home and clean up the apartment which is almost as big of a mess as my desk was because of the amount of stress I have been under this week. Then I am going to rest because I expect this coming week to be just as bad as this last week.

Thursday, August 18, 2005

It all sounds the same

I read a lot of weight loss blogs, or more precisely I lurk on a lot of weight loss blogs. I am horrible at commenting, but I read a lot. More and more, the longer I do this in fact, I begin to notice themes. There are very similar struggles going on all over the place, problems getting up in the morning to work out, eating too much, eating too little, working out too hard, losing motivation completely, becoming suddenly remotivated, thinking one should be motivated but not being able to manage motivation, and so on and so forth. I especially notice posts about having to stop hiding behind the weight, about the struggle to figure out who you are or would be without the extra weight. I was always a shy kid and despite finding great joy in being a performer I still struggle with shyness. I hate the telephone, I'm not big on huge social gatherings and I am not much of a partier. My whole life I was overweight, and it was an easy way to hide from the scary parts of the world. The hardest thing about losing weight, and I've said this before, are the games you have to play with your own mind. The fact people notice me now is startling and at times overwhelming, I am no longer invisible in the way that I was at 242lbs. I'll give you an example, I have an important court hearing today so I am really dressed up, white skirt suit, red three inch heels, red shirt. It is a visually striking outfit to say the least. I did not really think about that when I picked it last night, it was the only suit left in my closet. This morning at the gym, all of the women in the locker room commented on it and complimented me. It freaked me out, because even now I don't expect people to notice me or what I wear on a daily basis. This is funny given the fact I have a relatively high profile job as one of only a few prosecutors on a small island. It still caught me off guard and I have been thinking about why that is for the past hour. I never expected to be noticed because I did not think I was worthy of the notice. The only things I really liked were my hands, my eyes, and my hair, all things unaffected by my weight. Now, I am proud of my body, it is not perfect, but I earned it. My calves are becoming toned and muscular from running, I have great collar bones that showed up at about 200 lbs and are even more prominent now, and I have really good shoulders. That is what I personally see now and I project it to the people around me. People notice confidence and they respond to it and that is startling and even unerving to those of us who may never have had that kind of attention before. I am slowly learning to accept the praise and feel overwhelmed. The longer I do this, the more I focus on the greatest gift the weight loss has given me, I look like my brother, mother, and father more and more every day. The family features which were somewhat obscured by layers of fat have emerged and you can see our connection to each other.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

The mind-body connection

Somedays the mind is willing and the body is not, somedays the body is willing and the mind is not, somedays neither are willing. Today fell firmly into the third category. I'm exhausted, work is incredibly stressful, and I am not getting enough sleep. I ran anyway for 30 minutes and then did my 30 minutes on the eliptical. I've learned that as long as I just step onto the right machine, i.e. the treadmill, I will actually run. This is the way I look at it, you can do anything for an hour a day so I might as well workout hard regardless. The Navy Seals have this saying posted at their base in San Diego, "The only easy day was yesterday" and that has become my exercise philosphy. I don't have to like or even love it, I just have to get it done every single day. Admittedly, after I started running today, I had a pretty decent jog and I felt much better. I have run approximately 12 miles this week and if I run tomorrow I will have run around 15 miles for the week. Plus, I will have completely shattered my "I only have it in me to run three days every week." Now, I am going to do real work.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Just checking in

Over the past three days I have managed to run 9 miles. I am becoming one of those strange people who runs three miles everyday. I am still waiting for the point where I really enjoy it but I think really I am always going to like bits of it and not all of it. I was thinking about what I wrote yesterday and it occurs to me that the reverse is also true. This is to say, that there are people (including all of my close college friends) who have never seen me at any weight under 200 lbs. That is slightly odd to me, obviously I could post pictures here but I don't think it is appropriate because of my job. Anyway, I started this entry at 7 am and it is now after 11 and I need to focus on work. I was down to 160 lbs this morning which was my goal for this week.

Monday, August 15, 2005

Deep thoughts

I was thinking about something this morning as I was working out at my gym. In a nutshell, I was thinking about the fact that no one here has ever know me as the person I was in January of 2004. January of 2004 is my line in the sand if you will, it is when I began working out and eating right and for the first time in so many tries it stuck. In January of 2004 I was at least 242 pounds and really I probably weighed more that 242 lbs. I was a completely different person, physically, emotionally, in every way. No one here really knew that person. I was thinking about that this morning because I was running on the treadmill and every step I took was awful, my muscles are really sorry and they were cramping up on me. So, I made myself a deal, I would run for five minutes and see if it still hurt, if it still hurt I would stop running and move to the eliptical machine. In minute three my muscles were sufficiently warmed up (and yes I warm up before I start running) that the cramps faded away and I kept running. It was not a great run, but it was a thirty minute run which I would never have done in December of 2003. I would have stopped because it would be too hard and I would have given up. People in my office tease me about my fanatical devotion to the gym which includes getting up at 4:40 am every single morning during the week. They laugh at my insistence that the "food table" which usually has donuts and cookies on it, does not exist and is a fiction of my imagination. They worry about the fact I spend every lunch hour at my desk and never go out to eat. They see the healthy person and never saw the fat girl. More and more, I see that girl too, but I am still learning how to be that person. I'm learning that I am okay sticking with my salads and how much I love salads with apples and walnuts. I'm learning how to dress myself without hiding parts of myself for the first time. I'm learning to like exercise and how much better I feel when I run and my body is active. I'm learning to be okay with the choices I make each day and with the person I see in the mirror everyday. Most of all, I'm learning how to talk about who I was, who I am now, and how to make peace with the journey I have taken over the past couple of years.

Sunday, August 14, 2005

A brief check in

If you ever thing that you do not need to change up your weight workout every few weeks, well my rear and thighs would like to argue with you. Oh ow, I changed my leg and arm workout yesterday and today I am very sore. Basically I added an extra stretch on my lunges and a slight extension on my squats by finishing them off by standing on my tiptoes. Then I ran this morning which has no doubt increased the soreness. The first five minutes of running was hell on earth because even with a warm-up, one of my legs cramped up. However, it did improve and I managed 30 minutes. On Sunday I hit 161 so I am on target again. Work is very stressful right now so I am just trying to stay on plan and on track, so far it is working.

Friday, August 12, 2005

The weekend

This is my weekend to work so I am actually at the office. Yesterday despite feeling really exhausted and out of sorts I did actually manage to run for thirty minutes on the treadmill at 5.5 mph. So, I ran 4 out of 5 days this week and added an extra hour and 30 minutes of cardio into my schedule. I am still holding at 161.5 but I am wearing a size 10 dress and I am going to have to get rid of one of my size 12 suits because it is too large, so I cannot complain. I went out for drinks last night with my friends from work and as a result I never had dinner. I don't think large amounts of popcorn really count as a meal which is what we were served at the bar. Today is my day off from any sort of exercise which as always comes at the best time in the week because I am exhausted and tired from a very stressful work week. I am going to take the weekend easy because I expect Monday will be long and hard given the amount of work which is begining to pile up on my desk.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Conference girl

Tuesday and Wednesday of this week I was at a conference for my continuing legal education. I have some thoughts now that I am back at regular work. First, why do these sorts of events always serve pastries for breakfast? I swear there was not a piece of fruit within five miles of the conference room in the morning. I skipped all the baked goods and had coffee instead (I brought my own breakfast snack). Second, when did buffet lunches become an excuse for people to see how much food they can put on their plates? The one day they served lunch, I stuck to salads and a piece of chicken. I have grapefruit for desert, because in an odd move there was fruit at lunch. This clearly proves that the hotel had fruit in the building and could have served it at breakfast but I digress. The one great benefit of the conference was that it started at 8:30 am which meant I did not have to get to the hotel which is about 10 minutes from my apartment until a little after 8 am. So, I had an extra 30 minutes to workout. Tuesday and Wednesday I did 90 minutes of cardio instead of just 60. Today, since I am back on my normal schedule I did 75 minutes of cardio including 30 minutes of running at 5.5 mph. This week I have already run 3 times at 5.5 mph, maybe I will run tomorrow and make it 4 days for this first time in a long time. Running is definately getting easier and even though there was no air conditioning I actually felt pretty decent during the run. I hit 161.5 today on my scale, not sure how accurate it is but at least it is a move in the right direction.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

Monday rambling

This morning, I put aside all my lovely little excuses and ran at 5.5 mph for 30 minutes. I always think it qualifies as a good workout when you feel mildly ill at the end of it. Mostly, this was a challenge to myself since I can never make myself run on Mondays for some reason and I always feel guilty about it. So, I ran and then I used the eliptical machine and kicked up the resistence level on that by 1 level as well. A bottle of water and an energy bar later, I feel almost normal now. I was attempting to make up for a party I went to last night at one of my co-worker's houses, even though I did manage my food reasonably there and skipped the desert. Saturday morning despite my copious whining I hit 162 on the nose and though after the weekend I have climbed slightly to 162.5. So, I figure that I am still averaging my 1lb loss a week which is all that I am aiming for in the long term. I can maintain a pound loss a week, more than that is hard for me to maintain in the long run. Oh, I decided that I am not setting mini-goals this week, I am just trying to live up to all my previous goals and working on generally increasing the difficulty of my workouts. We will see how that goes for this week.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

I live on a tropical island and other excuses.

There was no running this morning. Want to know why? I live on a tropical island. Okay, maybe I should elaborate on that statement. I live on a tropical island and when the air conditioning is broken at the gym, I do not run. My gym rather resembled a small sauna this morning, and even though I have long ago adjusted to the heat here, I am not quite to the level of enthusiam required to run in a sauna for 20 or 30 minutes. The eliptical machine and I bonded this morning instead for a solid hour. I did however have a smaller cup of coffee this morning than normal, which I think can be considered as a small victory. I lifted weights last night and have a sore left shoulder to prove it, I think that must be due to poor form rather than intense lifting on my part. My body has entered the 163 plateau this week and is holding on for dear life, so I am just focusing on staying on plan and not worrying about it right now. 163 is a lot better than 173 which is where I was a little over a month ago, and way better than 250 where I start a year and a half ago, so I am not going to complain. Oh, and I am wearing suit pants that are too large which is always enjoyable, so overall life is good and what else can you really ask for on a friday. Plus, I live on a tropical island with all the beautiful white beaches and lush jungles I could ever want to explore.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Mini-Goal Review

1. 4 16 oz bottles of water a day and no soda-Yup, this one is still easy and has been accomplished. Once I got the soda out of the house it was easy to just drink water instead because there is not anything else available except for the soy milk for my cereal in the morning. 2. Drink less coffee (note the non-specificity, I'm just trying to cut down a little on caffine). I am not really managing well on this durring the week because I work in an office which feels like the artic tundra in the middle of a really bad cold snap. Therefore, I am going to start by eliminating coffee on weekends and drinking smaller cups of coffee in the morning on weekdays. I only have one cup of coffee a day so that is good. 3. Run 3 or more times this week (I think three times may be my limit) I ran this morning so that means I have actually accomplished this goal although I will probably try to run tomorrow as well. I have managed to work myself back up to 30 minutes of running and now I am working at getting back up to running the whole thing at about 5.5 mph (I am only running 15 minutes at 5.5 mph right now and the rest at 5.3 to 5.4 mph). 4. Lift weights 4 times this week. Once I lift weights tonight, this goal will be done for the week. It is pretty easy now that I have scheduled myself to lift weights on Sunday, Monday, Wednesday, and Thursday. I need to buy heavier and lighter weights this weekend because I only havy one set of 10 lb weights and I need more variety available for my workouts. 5. Have one really hard workout day-An attempt to ramp up how hard I workout. I am counting today as my hard workout day, I ran for 30 minutes and then did a pretty tough hill climb workout on the eliptical machine for another 20 minutes, plus I am lifting weights when I get home tonight. 6. Cut down on mayo-I really love mayo but I am trying to eliminate it from my diet again. So far, I have eaten no mayo this week, and I really need to remove it from my fridge so it is not sitting there taunting me to eat it. 7. Eat salad at lunch 2 times this week-here we go with cutting bread entirely out of my diet again. I brought salad for lunch today and I will probably have a salad on Saturday as well. I also had salad last night for dinner. I would have salad tomorrow but I don't want to go to the store to buy more lettuce today (I am basically out) and a co-worker is bringing in lunches tomorrow as a fundraiser for his son's school (the lunches involve chicken so I am just going to eat that bit and leave what does not fit in my diet). 8. No bread with dinner. This is pretty easy because I bought another roast chicken and I have been eating that and the fruit and vegetables in my house.

Tuesday, August 02, 2005

Catching my breath

This is the first time today I have really had a moment to catch my breath. I ran for 30 minutes this morning, along with another 25 minutes on the eliptical machine. Then I discovered that there was no hot water at my gym and ended up taking a freezing cold shower before going to work. I have been working ever since I got into the office at 7 am this morning. I spent all morning in court which always messes with my day in terms of getting paperwork done. Tonight, I am going to lift weights and then get to bed early because I am exhausted. Hopefully, I will still feel motivated enough to run tomorrow and make it three days in a row. We will see what happens tomorrow.

Monday, August 01, 2005

This is my day

This is how my day has gone so far, and it is only noon. Wake up with a horrible headache, stagger into the bathroom and take two pain pills. Forget to take pain pills to work in case needed later in the day. Go to the gym, run at a slowish pace due to combination of exhaustion and headache remnants. Use the eliptical machine, shower, go and buy coffee. Get asked the same question three times at the coffee store until actually realize the employees are speaking to you (helpful if only person in the shop at this point). Go to work, write two motions by 9 am and deal with very peeved co-worker about work issue. Decide you cannot live with your very messy desk so clean it off and discover many things which should have been previously dealt with only they got buried in mounds of paperwork. Make a molestation victim cry. Manage all this by 11 am at which time the headache has returned only without the pain medication option. Other than that I am fine and at least it is lunch time, so I am going to imbibe copious amounts of water now and see if that helps. Plus, I ran this morning and that it one day of running complete which is always a good thing.